Rose's Favorite Things: 2017

There's an amazing episode of 30 Rock where Liz Lemon gets smashed on a plane and thinks she's sitting next to Oprah. When she shows up at work, she's full of wonder over her Oprah encounter and enthusiastically shares a list of Oprah's favorite things (sweater capes, saltwater taffy and Chinese checkers.)

We've reached the end of 2017, kiddos. And, look, I know that I'm nowhere near as cool as Oprah. But I do have Favorite Things the way her majesty does. So I'd like to present you with Rose's Favorite Things, 2017 edition.

1) The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel: Where to even start. I have been a Gilmore Girls fan since the very beginning. The characters were vivid and loveable, the stakes relatively low, and the dialogue came at warp speed (something I aspire to to this day.) So I was nervous when I pressed play on the pilot of MMM, Amy Sherman Palladino's new show. Would this be another Bunheads (Amy SP's last show)? Inoffensive, but also watered down and meh? I crossed my fingers and prayed to the God of Amazon Prime that things would be different.

8 hours later, I emerged from a MMM haze, having watched every episode without getting up once. I didn't even need to go to the bathroom, or eat. Such is the magic of MMM. Amy SP's dialogue is BACK, along with beautiful production design and incredible performances by Rachel Brosnahan and ALEX BORSTEIN. Alex Borstein, who was previously in the running for the role of Sookie in GG and was relegated to a small part in the GG pilot playing a bitchy harpist. The voice of family guy's Lois. The human behind the problematic at best Ms Swan. Beloved by all, or at least, by most.

For those who aren't familiar, MMM is about a housewife who lives on the Upper West Side in the late 1950s. She's sharp, and funny, and seemingly has the perfect life. Until her life falls apart (as life is wont to do) and she turns to standup comedy to deal.

Watch it. Just... watch it.

Available on Amazon Prime Video

2) Old people with iPads: I just love them. It's all index fingers and frustration.

3) Activated charcoal: How could I not love something that both whitens your teeth AND may save you from dying after a drug overdose or a poisoning? What CAN'T this chalky black powder do? It took a little bit of practice to use this regularly without coating my bathroom in a thin layer of dust, but it's worth it. Though I don't suggest using it instead of normal toothpaste, adding it as a first step has done wonders for my teeth. And the fact that I keep using it is a real testament to its powers because I am normally extremely bored by dentalcare and it's has been a struggle to even make myself just floss 'n brush every single day of my life so far.

My pick: It doesn't seem to have a brand name, which is kinda shady, huh. Amazon 100% Natural Teeth Whitening Powder.

4) Sweetgreen's Curry Cauliflower bowl: There is nothing more enticing to a boring, one-dimensional girl than a Sweetgreen salad. Fresh ingredients, a cool logo, convenience and a price just north of reasonable. What more could you want?!

I do try to keep myself in a strict, make-my-lunches-at-home-on-Sundays rhythm but when I stray, it's usually for Sweetgreen. With just a few taps (#applife) I can order this bowl full of quinoa and chickpeas and goddamn magical fairydust, and with just a few more, I can choose a convenient pickup time AND request that the raisins be taken out. Because ew.

Plus, I get a free bowl on my birthday. So it practically pays for itself.

Sweetgreen Curry Cauliflower Bowl, picture courtesy of Sweetgreen
http://www.sweetgreen.com/

5) Fyre Festival: The Fyre Festival debacle happened in May of this year. It was all my May needed. Fyre Festival is, of course, the biggest disaster of a luxury music festival, conceived by a spoiled man child, presumably while he was in some designer-drug addled state. Billy McFarland had previously started other super shady, decidedly not profitable, unnecessary ventures so when the festival did collapse in on itself, it actually made a lot of sense. But the level on which the festival failed was something of legend.  It was funded with fake money and literally no real plan. When guests arrived on the "private Caribbean island" there were not enough bathrooms, or food. There was trash all over. Many of the artists weren't paid and, thus, did not show up. And once everyone figured out what was happening, the rush to get on a plane off the island caused widespread panic. I know that my morbid obsession with Fyre Festival does not really reflect well on me. And I have to live with that every day. But there is something about the privileged white man hubris resulting in such epic failure feels like the teeniest bit of vindication in an otherwise difficult year for anyone who has to work for anything. If, like me, you can't look away from this particular car crash, you can read about the infuriatingly vague and obnoxious investor deck here.

The only thing that is decidedly not funny is the fate of those who made the mistake of signing on to work for the festival- the vast majority of whom were incredibly smart/qualified and given ZERO time or resources to do their jobs. You can listen to the founder tell his employees that they aren't getting paid. I'll just go ahead and say it: fuck this guy (FWIW, he's been arrested since.)

6) Save The Dates (interactive web series): Full disclosure: this is a show that uses our (Eko's) platform for interactive video. But here's the thing- I am obsessed with this show. And I'm not at all contractually obligated to tell you this. In fact, my coworkers tease me about how funny I find this. But it's brilliant. You follow Chelsea on a blind date, with one of four guys. You make choices for the guys she's dating and it's so weird and so funny. There are three episodes, but hours of material if you replay (and I did)(and you should.) Thanks to the hilarious guys behind Cook St Productions, this has been such an awesome contribution to my year.

Save The Dates is available on the Eko platform (cough website cough)

7) Albert Finance: I love a good app. We carry around these hunks of aluminum and glass and we just wait for it to vibrate all day so we can feel something... why not try to harness its powers for good? Disclaimer: make no mistake, many finance and productivity apps claim to save you tons of time, and I have found this to be true almost never. Almost all of them require upkeep and general vigilance from the user in order to work properly. But they just make everything so much more fun.

Albert is like a beautiful (read: flat UI) slightly different version of the Mint app. Not only does it give you pretty graphics telling you you paid too much for Lyfts but came in under budget on your groceries, it regularly prompts you to complete short exercises that allow you to review your financial health and checks that it's interpreting data from your linked accounts correctly. Yes, you do have to link your bank accounts to get the full experience, but don't even stress about it, the government already has all of your info. That ship has circumnavigated the globe many times at this point.

Albert also analyzes your income and spending habits every day and sets aside small amounts of money you can safely save. It saves money FOR YOU but only when you can definitely afford it.

My favorite part of Albert is what they call "Albert Genius". For as little as $5 a month (you choose what you pay!) you can text their team of financial advisors PRETTY MUCH ANY MONEY QUESTION and they'll give you objective answers, colored with some mild guidance and suggestions, personalized based on your actual financial circumstances. They've already helped me through my student loan refi and gave me advice on how to start investing.

This app is not for those who have anything more than simple personal finance questions but for the price it's a little bit insane. I probably shouldn't even be writing about it, there's no way they won't start charging more once word gets out. We never had this talk.

Albert is available to download on the App Store, currently only available for iPhone.

8) SmittenKitchen.com: Deb. Deb, Deb, Deb. How is it that you have such a perfect internet presence and yet I don't resent you? This cooking blog, written by Deb Perelman, has been around for a while now, so the fact that it's one my 2017 favorite things only means that my love for Smitten Kitchen has some serious lasting power. I mean, she bills it as "Fearless cooking from a tiny kitchen in New York City." I live in New York! I have a tiny kitchen! I like to take pictures of my food like any red-blooded Millenial! 

This is a love that afflicts all of the Seyfried women.  And most of her recipes are of the simple and delicious variety- bitch mixes pretty much anything with an egg and fries it and brains explode around the interweb. Broccoli? Zucchini? Old newspaper? You name it, she's frittered it.

Cauliflower Feta Fritters, picture courtesy of Smitten Kitchen
https://smittenkitchen.com/2012/12/cauliflower-feta-fritters-with-pomegranate/

9) Laser hair removal: Get a Groupon. Suck it up. You'll resent every single time you have to go for a session (it takes 6-9 sessions to see permanent results) and you'll still end up thanking me. I was a waxer for years, which is an exercise in futility- a nice lady covers you in hot wax and RIPS IT OFF WTF in the opposite direction of how your hair grows. You go home red and sore and wake up the next morning to ingrown hairs. Wait six weeks, repeat. Laser hair removal is way less painful, and the FDA hasn't discovered yet what horrible side effects it has later on in life (score), and it works (hand to god). Not convinced? Let's say you spend $80 every six weeks for waxing, from ages 20 to 60. That's a lifetime cost of almost $30K and it's a miserable existence. For the same area, laser would cost you $1800 total at full price. But also Groupon! And it's permanent. Do it do it do it and then come back and tell me I'm right because I'll never stop wanting to hear that.

10) HQ Trivia: This is one of those fleeting, beautiful 2017 loves that I am positive will not hold it's place in the line-up particularly far into 2018. If you haven't been indoctrinated yet, basically, it's an app that's a live trivia game, that happens twice a day (3pm/9pm). 12 questions, progressively harder, and if you get them all right you win (or split) the pot, which is usually around $2K. At the time of writing, I have not won a game of HQ Trivia, but I haven't yet been discouraged enough to  NOT try to play when I'm free and the reminder on my phone goes off. It's bizarre to see the moment each afternoon when my entire start-up-y office stops what they're doing and picks up their phone, eyes glazed over until they miss a question and are eliminated (I've only ever made it to question 7.)  The regular host is an mysteriously popular guy named Scott Rogowsky, who has grown on me, I guess. Want some extra drama? Here's a super insane article about the HQ CEO being a crazy asshole to a reporter. for actually no reason. 

11) BECs: There are very few things that make me happier than a bacon egg and cheese sandwich on Sunday morning that I can eat in bed while I watch SNL from the night before.

12) The Onion: The Onion has been on its game this year. Did you know that it's been around since 1988? That's just shy of 30 years old. Way to go, The Onion. The current political climate has obviously provided lots of Onion fodder, but they do a great job of reporting on the equally important if slightly smaller news stories, such as this, which I laughed at for about 10 straight minutes. Honorable mentions to Reductress and AboveAverage.

13) My Favorite Murder: Oh my god ok. This podcast has popped up on the scene in the last couple of years and amassed an enormous following for good reason. Basically, it's two comedian friends (Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark) telling true crime stories. Serial killers, one off-ers, family killers, child killers, buzz killers, you name it. And somehow they make it hilarious and entertaining but still respectful and (duh) disapproving. Fans are called Murderinos, and they have multiple catch phrases from episodes, among them "Stay Sexy, Don't Get Murdered" and "You're In A Cult. Call Your Dad." This is prime commute listening, friends. Also, if I die and you find Wikipedia articles about murder in my browser history, this is what was happening there.

My Favorite Murder can be downloaded wherever you get your podcasts.

14) Levain cookies: The cronut was a disappointment and I don't need a rainbow colored bagel. But as far as trendy NYC foods go, Levain cookies absolutely live up to the hype. When I have the occasional day off of work, I'll make the journey up to the UWS just for these. They weigh about as much as a medium-sized cat and now that they opened a second location, there is never much of a line.

AND FINALLY... RAPID FIRE ROUND

Favorite artists: Sigrid, Matt Maeson, Astrid S, Greta Isaac, Oh Wonder, Phoebe Ryan, POWERS
Favorite first date spot: Doris (Bed Stuy)
Favorite place to write: Tom and Jerry's (NoHo)
Favorite workout: Boxing at Church Street Boxing Gym (TriBeCa)
Favorite movie: The Shape of Water
Favorite book: Meddling Kids by Edgar Cantero